I was reminded of the money changers in the temple that had their tables overturned by Christ. All that they knew and placed their confidence in was turned over and spilled out on the ground. It is funny how often people who travel to Uganda and other places to serve the Lord feel this way. Feel as though the Lord has overturned their cart and all of the things that they had been placing their trust in are dumped out on the ground. Only to return home with this feeling of being very exposed and almost a need to gather all of their items up again and place them back in the cart. For me seeing how God blew up my cart with the cross has left me feeling exposed and vulnerable and torn between part of me wanting to pick up the stuff on the ground and part of me not wanting to pick up anything but my cross and follow Christ. But taking up my cross means leaving all of the things that I do control lieing on the ground as I follow Christ. The grace of God draws me near and bids me come and die, that I may truly live.
Being broken by the cross to the point that it completely overwhelmed me. The magnitude of the grace that I was shown turned me inside out. It burned inside me to the point it caused me to ache because of what was done for me. To the point it felt as though I could not stand it any longer. Yet it is with joy I long to be set on fire again. It is like when we would play with grabbing an electric fence when we were kids. We would feel the electricity go through your entire body and you would not be able to control it. To feel the power of God pulsing through you, yet costing my ability to have control. It was painful, yet an exhilarating experience. I don't know if any of this makes sense to any one else, but I am trying to process something that I have struggled to make sense of and put into words. I have even found myself longing to relive that experience. There is part of me that desires to return to that experience, instead of the cross again. The experience is safer than the cross, because I lived through it. Yet I fight through this desire as well, and must just ask for God to draw me near to the cross again.
It is my prayer that Christ would be lifted up, that He would draw all men unto Himself. That men's hearts would be broken and set alive at the same time by the power of the cross. To the praise of the glory of His grace!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Popular Posts
-
I have been studying the story of the prodigal son. This passage has so come alive for me that it is often on my mind throughout the day. ...
-
At multiple points along the trip we almost had to pinch ourselves because the opportunity to view the work of God's hand was breathtaki... -
Do you feel God has extended you peace like a river today? Most likely that is NOT what you were feeling today as it seems real peace i...
-
I often ponder the question, "How would my life look different if I was sensitive to everything God wanted to do in me and through ... -
We live in a world that is revealing it is turning more and more inward to self. One of the ways this appears is the Entitlement mental... -
In reading a book recently on emotional manipulation it identified part of the strategy of manipulaters is to create a F.O.G. of fear,... -
I remember growing up watching the movie "Rocky" and all of the sequels. My brothers and I would rap towels around our hands and ... -
We held a men's retreat for the men of our church. The theme was, "The Greatest Thrill, Becoming Fisher's of Men!" ...
-
An article I wrote and never published because I thought there was already too much junk being written about the subject. Second, exact... -
It is funny how so much scripture comes alive when the Lord moves us to look through the proper perspective. A perspective that doesn't...
What a powerful analogy. Thanks Scott for reminding me that my table has been turned. Pray that God would give me grace and the strength to walk away from all my "things" and run without hindrance towards Him!
ReplyDelete